Dating: Does The Guy Always Have To Pay For The Date Or Should The Bill Be Split?

Should you split the bill? This story about saying what you mean when paying or splitting the bill makes me sad. Is it only worrywarts who experience recurring snapshots from the distant past that still make them sad?

Years ago, my parents went to dinner with the parents of my close friend. My mom and dad were of modest means and Close Friend’s parents owned Impressionist paintings. At the end of dinner, my father — ever the gentleman — offered to pick up the tab for the whole dinner. My friend’s father, a most charming and quirky man, said OK and thanks.
My mother told me this story, with a tsk-tsk undertone. My friend’s mother was also tsk-tsking. On the one hand, I can’t hold it against my friend’s father, because I know what a direct guy he was, one who always said what he meant and expected others to do the same. (I myself am so literal that when someone tells a joke, I think it really happened that a priest, a rabbi and a minister were in a bar… “No kidding!” I say.)
On the other hand, I would have expected human understanding to have kicked in and that Friend’s Father would have offered at least to split the cost of dinner. All this raises the general question: Should you split the bill? I nearly always offer to pay more if I order more; at Hank’s Oyster Bar, my favorite D.C. eating place, I become non-negotiable about paying for my indulgences when I can’t decide between the lobster roll dinner and the fried clams dinner, so I order both. At coffee with a friend, I simply cannot abide the “I’ll pay, you can pay next time” approach. It’s the kind of thing I would run home and put on my week-at-a-glance iCal and have to keep forwarding to remind myself. If I think a coffee or dinner mate is not rich enough to benefit from tax breaks for the wealthy (as for me, I can afford name-brand running shoes and organic kibbles for my beagle), I try to tip the pay scale my way.

On the other hand, when I’m with someone who owns an airplane, I might offer to pay half, but I don’t argue if he reaches for the bill with authority. A 60-year-old woman friend of mine insists on splitting the bill, especially on a first date. Otherwise, she feels beholden and obligated to go on a second date, even if she doesn’t want to, so that she can pay. As for younger singles, I found this comment on the Internet: If a guy agrees to split the bill on the first date, he is unlikely to ever have a second date. But if she isn’t chipping in by the third date, that is a sign she is a taker and not a giver. No man wants to date a taker. When going out in a group, some young people drink Coke, others imbibe multiple beers; some order a salad, others a steak.
Often, those in their teens and twenties need to spend prudently. One suggestion when anticipating an imbalance is to bring cash (preferably in small denominations) and, as soon as the bill comes, put your share on the table; be sure to include tax and tip (roughly 20 to 25% of your tab). Alternatively, invite your parents along and let them pay.
How do you deal with splitting the bill?
InformationNigeria

Obasanjo’s Surprise Appearance In Presidential Villa

Obasanjo’s Surprise Appearance, Presidential Villa

Former President Olusegun Obasanjo was at the Presidential Villa on Sunday.
He was accompanied by oil magnate, Mr. Femi Otedola, and both men were seen at the chapel, where the former President reportedly worshiped and prayed for the president and others who were there.
The official purpose of the visit was not disclosed, but sources speculated it visit might be for two purposes.
The first, they said, might be a meeting between Obasanjo and President Goodluck Jonathan to resolve their well-publicized differences, while the other might be a discussion of the $620,000 bribery standoff involving Otedola and a member of the House of Representatives, Mr. Farouk Lawan.
While Otedola was the giver of the bribe, which was allegedly for the purpose of overlooking his company involvement in the fuel subsidy scam, Mr. Lawan, the receiver of the bribe money, was arraigned in court in Abuja on Friday and is remanded to jail pending a bail hearing.  Next Friday, his bail application will be heard by Justice Mudashiru Oniyangi.
It was learnt that while there have been calls for the arraignment of Otedola as well, the former President may have gone to Aso Rock to convince the President that the oil magnate be made a prosecution witness in the trial of Lawan.
With reference to the reconciliation theory, both Obasanjo and Jonathan have squared up lately, especially on the need to tame the members of the Boko Haram sect.  Obasanjo has continually blamed the President for not acting to end the endless killings of the sect.
In a widely-disseminated opinion article yesterday, Jonathan’s spokesman, Mr. Reuben Abati, denounced “The Hypocrisy of Yesterday’s Men,” a loose reference to the debate started by former Minister of Education Oby Ezekwesili, who recently invited the government to a public debate over squandered resources.  The government said it would do no such thing.
“When one of them was in charge of this same estate called Nigeria, he shut down the Port Harcourt airport and other airports for close to two years under the guise of renovation,” he wrote in apparent reference to Obasanjo.  “The Port Harcourt airport was abandoned for so long it was overgrown with weeds after serving for months as a practice ground for motoring schools. It was reopened without any improvement and with so much money down the drain, and the pervasive suspicion that the reason it was shut down in the first place was to create a market for a new airline that had been allowed the monopoly use of the other airport in the city.”
On the contrary, according to Abati, “Under President Jonathan, airports across the country are being upgraded, rebuilt and modernized; in less than two years, the transformation is self-evident.”
He lamented: “We have too many yesterday men and women behaving too badly. We are dealing with a group of power-point technocrats who have mastered the rhetoric of public grandstanding: carefully crafted emotion-laden sound bites passed off as meaningful engagements.”
Saharareporters

How Police brutalize suspects to obtain statements – Report

By Wale Odunsi

An international rights group, Avocats Sans Frontiers, France, also known as Lawyers Without Borders, say the Nigerian Police rely mostly on torture to obtain information from suspects.
The report was contained in a case-law hand book developed as part of the implementation of the ‘Promotion of the United Nations Convention Against Torture’ project.
The project was set up in the country by ASF France and its development partners, the Legal Aid Council of Nigeria and the Nigerian Bar Association.
The report notes that apart from torture, majority of suspects were detained for long period without being charged to court.
Part of the document reads: “In most of the cases handled by ASF France and its partners, the victims endured severe violence during their detention.
“Many persons” were beaten repeatedly by police officers in prison, some of them suffering particularly inhuman and degrading treatments.”

“It appears that such treatments are carried out commonly in several detention facilities by the police to obtain full confessions from detained persons.”
“In many cases, victims were detained for three or four years before they appear before a judge.”
The report further revealed the pitiable conditions of the police detention facilities, and also accused police officers of arresting relatives of suspects in cases where the accused persons are not available.
DailyPost

Our promise of free sex boosted Eagles against Ivory Coast – Nigerian prostitutes

By Comrade Godwin Ameh

As Nigerians continue to celebrate the victory of the Super Eagles over the Ivorian national team otherwise, known as the Elephant, Association of Nigerian Prostitutes (ANP) has said that their promise of one-week free sex boosted the Eagles victory against Ivory Coast.
In a telephone chat with DailyPost, ANP General Secretary, Jessica Elvis while congratulating the Super Eagles for flying over the Ivorians said they have not forgotten their promise.
Her words: “We are really happy for the sweet victory over Drogba and co. Our free sex promise contributed massively to this victory and I must thank my members for this decision.
Speaking further, a visibly elated Elvis said: “Our target is not to get to the semi final or the final, all we want is the cup and with the usual support of ANP, Super Eagles must fly,” she said.
“We are making plans to send more ANP members to South Africa to support the Eagles for the next match,” she added.

Asked if there would be free sex for the victory over Ivory Coast, Jessica after a long laughter said: “Ashawo, come f’**k, na gold we talk no be semi final.
“Seriously we are ready to declare one week of free sex if they get the gold,” she assured.
The Super Eagles of Nigeria defeated the Elephants of Ivory Coast in a quarter-final encounter that was played this afternoon in South Africa, with Mba scoring a brilliant winning goal.
DailyPost

“We stopped the Ivorians from playing” – Mikel Obi

By Ifreke Inyang

John Mikel Obi, has revealed that their winning formula against Cote d’Ivoire, was to stop them from playing.
Sunday Mba and Emmanuel Emenike scored, as the Super Eagles of Nigeria progressed into the semi-finals and the Chelsea midfielder says it is their reward for sticking to their game plan.
“We’re very happy with our achievement,” Mikel said after the game. “A big congratulations to Ivory Coast for their achievement so far in the tournament but today we knew that they’re a good team so if we were able to work together and play for each other on the pitch, then we could stop them.

When asked about Nigeria’s chances of playing in the firs final since 2000, he said: “We still have a semi final to play. We have to keep taking each game one at a time and hopefully if we manage to play well like we did today, we will be very pleased with ourselves.”
Nigeria will face Mali in the final four on Wednesday in Durban.
DailyPost

‘Ifreke Inyang – “Nigeria can win the AFCON” – 6 things we learnt from Super Eagles’ victory over Cote d’Ivoire

By Ifreke Inyang

Nigeria can win the AFCON
Let me catch my breath. Was that the Super Eagles of Nigeria against the Elephants? Did we utterly dominate the quarter-final clash or what? Every single player was up for the game. Less fancied names like Onazi Ogenyi, Sunday Mba, etc stood up tall and strong against true football superstars like Yaya Toure and Didier Drogba. Save for that little blip defensively, that led to Tiote levelling scores, the Eagles were almost perfect. Long may it continue. And who knows? With this kind of form, we fear no foe!
Keshi is a decent coach afterall
He has come under criticisms recently, following the Eagles’ poor run to the quarter-finals, but when he mattered, he proved he is just as brilliant as the big name managers. The former boss of the Togo national team, galvanised his players, motivated them to play without fear or favour and stuck to players that we didn’t think should be there. And they delivered.
Adieu, Didier
Surely, we don’t expect Drogba to be at the next AFCON. It is over. And sadly, for one of the truly great strikers that has emerged from Africa, he will never get a chance to lift the trophy. A few of his team mates, are also gone past their age and the ‘golden generation’ has ended.
Mba, a vindication for the EPL

As Mba surged through the middle, evading every single Ivorian tackle and finishing off with aplomb, it rolled back the years. When a certain Daniel ‘The Bull’ Amokachi, left players fallin off him, like rag dolls. And no, Mba does’t ply his trade in England, in France or even in Macedonia. He plays for Rangers of Enugu. Keshi’s faith handsomely rewarded.
Officiating has not improved
The free-kick that led to Cote d’Ivoire’s goal was rather cheap. Drogba fell to the ground too easily and the referee was conned. Once again, save from the sleeping defence, Nigerians are punished with a goal, from absolutely nothing. Officiating must improve in South Africa, as the competition gets into the crucial stages.
@TheRealEboue will get an earful
Well, it was a much publicised affair – how a parody Eboue account played Nigerians all week long, taunting them at will and expressing supreme confidence that they’d run over the Super Eagles. One place you’d rather not be? His Twitter mentions.
DailyPost

Kumbaya: Obasanjo praying for Jonathan at the Villa today (SNAPSHOT)

inShare

by Isi Esene
According to the Special Adviser to the President on Media and Publicity, Reuben Abati, former President Olusegun Obasanjo and President Goodluck Jonathan worshiped together at the Aso Rock Villa Chapel earlier today.
Abati tweeted, “Fmr President Obasanjo attends church service today at the Aso Rock Villa Chapel.”
Both men also reportedly had lunch together.
YNaija.com















YNaija.com