Tuesday, 6 August 2013

Nigeria As Lagbaja’s Perfect Mumudom, By Okey Ndibe

The masked phenomenon known simply as Lagbaja is one of the few Nigerian musicians whose art is inspired by the late Fela Anikulapo-Kuti.

In keeping with the Felaian spirit, Lagbaja’s act and art combine prodigious, heart-thumping entertainment with a political message that, at its eloquent best, has the powerful effect of summing up the Nigerian “condition.”
Fela, for example, flung the word “zombie” in our faces. In the heydays of military rule, when our uniformed men exhibited the complex of mini, mindless gods – flinging the lash at hapless civilians or shooting at the slightest provocation – Fela’s term captured that syndrome of senseless, rampaging power.
The way Fela deployed the word was deeply penetrating.
“Zombie” entered Nigerians’ social lexicon, a handy word for all battered or potentially battered subjects of military despotism. The word entrenched itself as the most natural way to describe the military honchos who ruled (and ruined) us.
It also described the antics of the uniformed minions who – forgetting that they were victims of misrule – seemed ever willing to keep the rest of us in line, to still voices of dissent, to serve any regime with rabid, ferocious efficiency.
Fela also gave us “ITT,” deconstructing the name of an international telecommunications corporation headed by the late Moshood Kashimawo Abiola to yield a new term: “International Thief Thief.”
His song, “Beast of No Nation,” proclaimed the collective bastardry of the Nigerian society just as his “Overtake Don Overtake Overtake” (ODOO) is a shorthand for anomie.
Today, it is Lagbaja, I suggest, who has offered us the handiest name for our collective malady.
In a recent song that should become as much an anthem as Fela’s “Zombie,” Lagbaja famously calls Nigerians 200 million mumu. The word mumu is a quintessentially Nigerian word, its rich inflections and negative connotations derived from its pedigree. It translates (rather prosaically) as a fool, a buffoon, a person susceptible to scams and other forms of trickery.
In the lyrics, Lagbaja names some of the big men who have shaped – that is to say, misshaped – Nigeria: Ibrahim Babangida, Sani Abacha, and Olusegun Obasanjo.
But there’s an unusual, jolting twist in the song.
As the listener settles to it, expecting to hear the familiar “yabis” – words of insults usually lobbed at the country’s past and present misrulers – Lagbaja turns his barbed tongue on the so-called “ordinary” Nigerian, the “followers.”
In his worldview, all Nigerians are part and parcel of the fabric of corruption and oppression that the unfortunate among us bemoan.
In Chinua Achebe’s fourth novel, A Man of the People, one of the characters earns a chilly, censorious look when he teases the ill-educated, prototypically corrupt politician, Chief M.A. Nanga, with an old joke: “MA, minus opportunity.”
Lagbaja uses a similar linguistic move on all of us. Nigerians, all of us, are corrupt – he seems to say – minus opportunity.
At any rate, Lagbaja sees the lot us as mumu, collaborators in our own oppression and debasement, architects of our collective misfortune.
At first glance, Lagbaja’s would appear to be a harsh, excessive and even misplaced indictment. But it’s hard to deny that there’s a vital sense in which the musician is right on target.
In fact, it’s impossible to undertake any retrospective of events in Nigeria without coming to the conclusion that too many Nigerians act as fertilizers for the malaise that plagues and wrecks their lives.
Let’s take some of the recent events from the past week or two.
We’ve watched – some riveted with peculiar glee – as politicians from Rivers State darted onto the stage to offer us a veritable theater of the absurd.
In an act of particular impunity, four or five members of the state assembly attempted to stage a spurious impeachment of the speaker and to replace him with one of their number. Backed by powerful politicians in Abuja (including, some suggest, President Goodluck Jonathan and his wife), these legislative renegades were prepared to act on the proposition that they outnumbered 27 or so other lawmakers loyal to the speaker they sought to remove.
A physical fight ensued to settle this sordid, “political” arithmetic.
In the melee, one legislator seized a make-shift mace imported by the Abuja-backed renegades and used it to batter a colleague, Michael Chinda – a member of the Abuja Collective.
Numerous videos of the fracas have gone viral on youtube. In them, we see so-called lawmakers who should have been on Nigeria’s boxing team at the London Olympics.
We see the police at their inefficient worst, unable to control a rowdy gathering of thuggish legislators and their hired thugs. We see one of the lawmakers ready to kill or die because the state governor, Chibuike Rotimi Amaechi, had insulted his “mother,” aka Patience Jonathan, aka (the fuming pugilist’s) “Jesus Christ on earth.”
I wrote a few weeks ago that there was no substantive principle at play in the political crisis in Rivers State – or in any location in Nigeria, for that matter. It’s all a game about who gets to steal the most from the commonwealth and who gets to rape the people.
Neither faction in the dispute is actuated by the public good. Power, the acquisition of raw power for self-aggrandizement, is the governing motivation.
If Mrs. Jonathan now functions as divinity, a “Jesus Christ on earth,” then her husband, who fancies himself a “transformational leader,” must occupy a special seat in any gathering of leaders, dwarfing such figures as Barack Obama, David Cameron, Angela Merkel, and Paul Kagame.
Yet, the terribly injured Chinda could find no hospital within the precincts redeemed by Mrs. Jonathan and transformed by her husband for treatment. Instead, it was to Mr. Cameron’s Britain that the battered Chinda was flown for urgent surgery.
Here’s a safe bet: Mr. Chinda is not spending a penny of his money to pay his bills at the Bupa Cromwell Hospital in Britain. There’s a chance that the hospital demanded and received full payment before commencing treatment. At any rate, those bills will be paid with public funds, most likely provided by his sponsors in Abuja.
The arrangement makes a mumu of all of us who accept this daylight abuse of public resources.
Nigerian lawmakers, state as well as national, are paid obscene sums of money. Yet, they hardly ever use the instrument of the law to address the crises that menace the lives of Nigerians – including a non-existent healthcare system.
Instead, they gallivant, carouse, undertake meaningless jamborees in Nigeria and abroad, and – when it suits them – take to boxing. They hardly work, but when they fall sick, they travel to such addresses as Britain, Germany, South Africa and India where people work hard and use their brain power.
As if Chinda’s transfer to a British hospital was not wasteful enough, last week a group of his backers, including a junior minister, Nyesom Wike, flew to London to commiserate with him.
The odds are excellent that the government in Abuja paid for the flight tickets and hotel accommodation of the five or so well-wishers – to say nothing of spending cash. Mr. Wike and his team must not know how ludicrous they appear to their British hosts; they have no idea how the British would use them as the butt of jokes: Here are these Africans who have too much money but not a bit of sense to do anything for themselves!
It’s an altogether awful picture. I doubt that Mr. Chinda has sponsored a single bill that improved the lives of the people of Rivers State by a jot.
Instead, he lent himself as a stooge to carry out the designs of those in power in Abuja, determined to lay waste to his state. He is injured serving this despicable agenda. And then Nigerians, including the hapless people of his home state, must pay the tab for his treatment in London.
A statement released by Mr. Wike’s team underscored the ridiculousness of it all.
It began: “Prominent leaders of Rivers State from across political and professional divides on Saturday visited the member representing Obio/Akpor State Constituency 2 at the Bupa Cromwell Hospital in London, United Kingdom, where the legislator is recuperating from head and jaw surgeries carried out on him by medical experts in the health facility.”
Then it stated that “the leaders were grateful to God for the survival of Hon. Michael Chinda despite the vicious knocks he received from the mace-wielding Majority Leader of the Rivers State House of Assembly, Mr. Chidi Lloyd.”
These parasites, shameless consumers of other people’s products and enterprise, are the kind of characters who pass for “leaders” in Nigeria.
There are also figures like Ango Abdullahi, a saber rattling jingoist who insists that Nigeria’s presidency must be turned over to a “northerner” or there will be mayhem.
Even though Mr. Abdullahi wears the prefix of professor, he doesn’t evince any interest in stellar leadership. It suffices for him that somebody from the so-called North – any “northerner,” however mediocre or visionless – assume the presidential office.
It all boils down to clownishness. I’m with Lagbaja: the fact that the vast majority from all parts of Nigeria permit certifiable clowns to pollute and deform our lives makes us 200 million mumu inhabiting a perfect mumudom!
PremiumnTimes

PHOTOS: Babatunde Fashola’s Father Buried

 

The remains of Alhaji Ademola Fashola, the father of the Governor of Lagos State, were this afternoon laid to rest at the Vaults and Gardens Cemetery, Ikoyi, Lagos, southwest Nigeria amidst torrents of tributes.
the-remains-of-pa-fashola-arriving-at-his-surulere-home-lagos-this-morning-for-the-lying-in-state_2_ (1)
The remains of Pa Fashola arriving at his Surulere home, Lagos this morning for the lying in state
Fashola died on Monday at the age of 80 after a protracted illness. Prayers were offered for the repose of his soul at the Lagos Central Mosque, Lagos Island before he was taken to the Vaults and Gardens for burial.
Earlier in the day, the remains of Pa Fashola laid in state at his residence at Ladipo Labinjo Street, Surulere where sympathisers paid their last respects.
His body arrived at his residence from the mortuary in black Merceses Benz SUV at about 11:55am while a lying in state was later held in his honour at Surulere Senior Secondary School.
Among the early callers at his residence were Senator Gbenga Ashafa, Rasak Okoya, Chief Molade Okoya-Thomas, Alhaji Lateef Okunnu, Subomi Balogun, Surulere Council boss, Tajudeen Ajide, Kayode Opeifa, Joe Igbokwe, Onigbongbo LCDA boss, Babatunde Oke, representatives of Arewa and Ndigbo, Service Chiefs, Commissioners among others Members of Eko Club who were present at the lying in state, described him as a jolly good fellow and prayed that almighty Allah grant him aljannat firdaus.
At the grave side, the Muslim clerics offered prayers for Pa Fashola’s repose and prayed God to grant him eternal rest before he was lowered to the grave in the presence of the governor, Babatunde Fashola and other siblings.
The burial was also witnessed by prominent Nigerians who came to pay their last respects to the deceased. Torrents of tributes from Nigerians have continued to pour in for the late Pa Fashola.
In his tribute, constitutional lawyer, Prof. Itse Sagay, Afenifere Renewal Group, ARG, and several Nigerians joined others in mouring the deceased. Sagay described the news of Fashola’s father’s death as devastating and commiserated with Governor Babatunde Fashola over the loss.
According to him, “the death of Fashola’s father is emotionally devastating. It is shocking. People will say he died as an old man, but to the immediate family, no one is ever old, they still want him around. I will personally write to the governor to commiserate with him.”
gov.-fashola-his-mother-omolara-and-his-brother-at-the-lying-in-state.photos...idowu-ogunleye_2_
Gov. Fashola, his mother, Omolara, and his brother at the lying in state
Sir Victor Olaiya, a high life maestro and childhood friend of the late Pa Ademola Fashola, on Monday said he would miss the deceased a lot. Olaiya, who was among the early callers at the residence of the deceased, told newsmen that he was humorous and loved to make people happy.
“I will miss his jokes and his smile. We were together many years ago when he was at Daily Times. He was nice, humble and kind and it would be difficult not to miss somebody like that,” the music legend said.
Lagos State Deputy Governor, Adejoke Orelope-Adefulire has expressed her shock and sadness over the death of Pa Fashola, noting that the state would have loved to have more of him around. In a statement signed by the Special Assistant to the Deputy Governor on Media, Tunde Abatan, she noted that the late Alhaji Fashola was a great supporter and adviser of the government, who was never afraid to express his opinion on all policies of government.
“Papa was always available to offer his advice on all issues relating to the governance and the welfare of the people of Lagos State. He was always frank in his discussion and telling us what he feels we are not doing right or what the people expect from us,” Adefulire was quoted to have said. Adefulire prayed to the Almighty Allah to grant him a place in Al-Jannah.
She also prayed to God to comfort and give the families and friends left behind the strength to bear the loss. Alhaji Bolaji Fashola, the head of the family, said they were devastated by the news of the death of the octogenarian.
He told newsmen that members of the family were shattered by the death of the deceased. The family patriarch described the deceased as a kind man who would do everything to satisfy everybody. He said that he was with late Pa Fashola on Sunday and never knew he would be gone so soon.
“I was with him on Sunday. He was breathing heavily and he said he wanted to sleep and I left for home. I was shocked when I got the news today (Monday) that he had died. It is so sad. Everybody is shattered,” the patriarch said.
Also, Afenifere Renewal Group, ARG, in a statement signed by its Publicity Secretary, Kunle Famoriyo, said it received with shock the passing of Pa Ademola Fashola, saying “we commiserate with our Governor and all members of his family on the transition of their patriarch to the great land beyond.
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Ademola Fashola will be buried in tomb here
“Our solace lies in the comfort that the passing of our father in the Holy Month of Ramadan is a reassurance that he is resting in the bosom of Allah after a life well spent. Pa Fashola’s legacies are clearly evidenced by the leadership, diligence and disciplined character his son is exhibiting across all spheres of governance in Lagos State.”
ARG prayed that God would continue to abide with the Fashola family as “He gives them the strength and faith to bear this huge loss. May Pa Fashola’s soul rest in perfect peace.”
Reacting, Mr. Joe Igbokwe, spokesman of All Progressives Congress, APC, Lagos State, said Pa Fashola lived a life marked by simplicity and integrity, saying despite being the father of the Lagos State Governor, he was not known to have thrown his weight about to reflect that lofty position.
“He was a principled man who trained and brought up his children through the straight and narrow path. This strict disciplinary background is shown in the life of his son, Babatunde Raji Fashola, who has shown tremendous personal attributes that have helped set a record in hardwork, discipline and accountability in the governance of Lagos these past six years. I pray that the spirit of Pa Fashola find eternal rest in the bosom of the Lord,” he said.
The Vice Chairman, Senate Committee on Lands, Housing and Urban Development, Senator Gbenga Ashafa commiserated Governor Fashola over the demise of his father, describing the deceased as cool and calm with rare humility and high sense of discipline.
“We all are going to miss Alhaji Ibrahim Ademola Fashola for his fatherly advice at all times. If not for this untimely death, we would have celebrated his 80th birthday next month. Above all, God knows best. I pray that God Almighty gives the entire Fashola family the fortitude to bear the irreparable loss. May his gentle soul rest in perfect peace,” he said.
A member of the House of Representatives, Yakub Balogun described the death of Fashola’s father as sad and unfortunate, saying the deceased was a great man who spoke the truth at all times, with the fear of God as his watchword. He said Fashola’s father would be greatly missed by all, praying God to grant his soul eternal rest and the family, especially the governor the fortitude to bear the great loss.
Femi Gbajabiamila, a member of the House of Representatives, representing Surulere Federal Constituency area of Lagos at the House, said: “I heard the sad news. I knew the Governor’s father personally because he worked with my mother when she was the chairman of Surulere Local Government.
“He was a wonderful and unassuming man. He will be greatly missed. We, however, must thank God for the life he lived and the son he produced for us in Lagos. May his soul rest in perfect peace.”
Reacting to the death of the governor’s father, interim National Publicity Secretary of the All Progressive Congress, APC, Alhaji Lai Mohammed, described it as shocking, adding that the man passed on at a time his elderly advice was needed.
“It is a very sad loss. He left us at this time we need him most. He was an extremely humble man and never carried himself as the father of the governor,” he said, while praying that God should grant the departed eternal rest while condoling with the governor and other members of the bereaved family.
Chairman of the Lagos State House of Assembly Committee on Local Government Administration and Chieftaincy Affairs, Moshood Oshun, described the incident as unfortunate.
“Thank God he left beautiful children among whom is the governor of Lagos state. I condole with the bereaved family and sincerely pray that God should grant him aljana fiddaus,” Oshun, representing Mainland Constituency 2 at the House, said.
Chairman, Lagos Assembly Committee on Education, Science and Technology, Wahab Alawiye-King, said the incident was saddening, adding that “he was like a father to many of us and consistently advised us whenever we met him. In fact, he left at a time we wanted more of his elderly advice.”
The representative of Lagos Island Constituency II prayed that God should give the family the fortitude to bear the loss. Another lawmaker and representative of Apapa Constituency II at the Lagos State House of Assembly, Muyiwa Jimoh, said: “the man lived a fulfilled life, one as a journalist and secondly as the father of a performing governor. My encounter with him was in the holy land, he was a man loaded with ideas.”
Senate Minority Whip, Senator Ganiyu Olanrewaju Solomon while reacting to the death of the Governor’s father, commiserated with Fashola, urging the governor to take heart and thank God that his father lived a fulfilled life.
“We are all pained by this sudden death but we take delight in the fact that papa lived a fulfilled life of a good father to his children, a good husband to his wife and devoted servant of Allah,” he said while praying God to give the entire Fashola family the fortitude to bear the huge loss.
“No matter how old, it is always painful to lose one’s parent. I really feel for the Faholsa family on this particular incident,” he added.
The Chairman of Surulere Local Government, Tajudeen Ajide, also described the death as a blow to the governor and the state. Another member of the House of Representatives, James Faleke described the death “as devastating news, especially coming at this time. At this point of our political development, the advice and words of wisdom from Papa could have been invaluable for us. But we take solace that the Senior Fashola lived a fulfilled life.”
A former Senator, Muniru Muse said the news of the Octogenarian’s death was shocking, saying that “we need his advice and words of wisdom at this very crucial time, but who are we to blame God? He has His reason for taking Papa away.”
InformationNigeria

Are We Truly Ready to Develop and Unite Nigeria? By Sanusi Lamido Sanusi

sanusi


Sanusi Lamido Sanusi on a book launch In Lagos.


“Let me start by saying that I am Fulani (laughter). My grandfather was an Emir and therefore I represent all that has been talked about this afternoon. Sir Ajayi has written a book. And like all Nigerians of his generation, he has written in the language of his generation.”

“My grandfather was a Northerner, I am a Nigerian. The problem with this country is that in 2009, we speak in the language of 1953. Sir Olaniwun can be forgiven for the way he spoke, but I cannot forgive people of my generation speaking in that language.”

“Let us go into this issue because there are so many myths that are being bandied around. Before colonialism, there was nothing like Northern Nigeria, Before the Sokoto Jihad, there was nothing like the Sokoto caliphate. The man from Kano regards himself as bakane. The man from Zaria was bazazzage. The man from Katsina was bakatsine. The kingdoms were at war with each other. They were Hausas, they were Muslims, and they were killing each other. “The Yoruba were Ijebu, Owo, Ijesha, Akoko, Egba. When did they become one? When did the North become one? You have the Sokoto Caliphate that brought every person from Adamawa to Sokoto and said it is one kingdom.They now said it was a Muslim North.”

“The Colonialists came, put that together and said it is now called the Northern Nigeria. Do you know what happened? Our grand fathers were able to transform to being Northerners. We have not been able to transform to being Nigerians. The fault is ours. Tell me, how many governors has South-West produced after Awolowo that are role models of leadership? How many governors has the East produced like Nnamdi Azikiwe that can be role models of leadership? How Manygovernors in the Niger Delta are role models of leadership? Tell me. There is no evidence statistically that any part of this country has produced good leaders. You talk about Babangida and the economy. Who were the people in charge of the economy during
Babangida era? Olu Falae, Kalu Idika Kalu. What state are they from in the North?”

“We started the banking reform; the first thing I heard was that in Urobo land, that there will be a curse of the ancestors. I said they (ancestors) would not answer. They said why? I said how many factories did Ibru build in Urobo land? So, why will the ancestors of the Urobo people support her?”

“We talk ethnicity when it pleases us. It is hypocrisy. You said elections were rigged in 1959, Obasanjo and Maurice Iwu rigged election in 2007. Was it a Southern thing? It was not.”

“The problem is: everywhere in this country, there is one Hausa, Ibo, Yoruba and Itshekiri man whose concern is how to get his hands on the pile and how much he can steal.Whether it is in the military or in the civilian government, they sit down, they eat together. In fact, the constitution says there must be a minister from every state.”

“So, anybody that is still preaching that the problem of Nigeria is Yoruba or Hausa or Fulani, he does not love Nigeria. The problem with Nigeria is that a group of people from each and every ethnic tribe is very selfish. The poverty that is found in Maiduguri is even worse than any poverty that you find in any part of the South. The British came for 60 years and Sir Ajayi talked about few numbers of graduates in the North (two at independence) . What he did not say was that there was a documented policy of the British when they came that the Northerner should not be educated. It was documented. It was British colonial policy. I have the document. I have published articles on it. That if you educate the Northerner you will produce progressive Muslim intellectuals of the type we have in Egypt and India. So, do not educate them. It was documented. And you say they love us (North).”

“I have spent the better part of my life to fight and Dr. (Reuben) Abati knows me. Yes, my grandfather was an Emir. Why was I in the pro- democracy movement fighting for June 12? Is (Moshood) Abiola from Kano ? Why am I a founding director of the Kudirat Initiative for Nigerian Development (KIND)?

“There are good Yoruba people, good Igbo people, good Fulani people, good Nigerians and there are bad people everywhere. That is the truth.”

“Stop talking about dividing Nigeria because we are not the most populous country in the world. We have all the resources that make it easy to make one united great Nigeria . It is better if we are united than to divide it.”

“Every time you talk about division, when you restructure, do you know what will happen? In Delta Area, the people in Warri will say Agbor, you don’t have oil. When was the Niger Delta constructed as a political entity? Ten years ago, the Itshekiris were fighting the Urobos. Isn’t that what was happening? Now they have become Niger Delta because they have found oil. After, it will be, if you do not have oil in your village then you cannot share our resources.”

“There is no country in the world where resources are found in everybody’s hamlet. But people have leaders and they said if you have this geography and if we are one state, then we have a responsibility for making sure that the people who belong to this country have a good nature.”

“So, why don’t you talk about; we don’t have infrastructure,­ we don’t have education, we don’t have health. We are still talking about Fulani. Is it the Fulani cattle rearer or is anybody saying there is no poverty among the Fulani?”

This is a great message to our generation. Are we truly ready to develop and unite Nigeria?

NewsRescue

“Okorocha’s suspension is to pave way for APGA merger with PDP” – APC


Gov Rochas Okorocha
]The All Progressives Congress (APC) in South East has described the suspension of Imo State Governor, Rochas Okorocha, from the All Progressives Grand Alliance (APGA) as “the final phase of a possible merger of the party (APGA) with the ruling Peoples Democratic Party (PDP).”
In a statement issued by APC South East Zonal Publicity Secretary, Osita Okechukwu, the party recalled that “the first phase to merge APGA with PDP started with the South East Zonal Rally of the PDP before the 2011 general elections, where APGA publicly declared support for the PDP.”
APC lamented that “APGA National Chairman, Victor Umeh, who fought gallantly against this unholy merger, has finally capitulated.”
Continuing, “With the exit of Dim Emeka Odimegwu Ojukwu, Dikedioramma Ndigbo, Governor Peter Obi of Anambra State commenced the final phase of the merger.
“Let’s not forget that our revered leader, Dim Ojukwu was first BoT chairman of the All Peoples Party (APP) and if he was alive, he would have been the first Igbo man to embrace the APC.
“We regret that APGA National Chairman, Chief Victor Umeh, who fought gallantly against this unholy merger, capitulated lately.

“It is the considered view of APC South East Zone that 14 years down the line, Ndigbo gave unalloyed support to the PDP without commensurate result; hence it will be foolhardy to continue.
“In 1999, PDP promised and repeatedly before 2003, 2007, 2011 elections the dualisation of Abakaliki-Enugu, Abia-Akwa-Ibom, Kogi-Anambra roads, reconstruction of Port Harcourt-Enugu, Onitsha-Enugu roads, Enugu Coal-Fired-Plant, 2nd Niger Bridge, Onitsha Port etc.
“The rest they say is history, as we are yet to see any ship berthing at the Onitsha Sea Port launched with fanfare by President Goodluck Jonathan nor where the second Niger Bridge is located in any federal budget. What we saw is patching of roads.”
Okechukwu enjoined Ndigbo to register with the APC, stressing that the party will focus on providing critical infrastructure for the industrialisation of Nigeria.
Okorocha, who reacted to his suspension, maintained that he joined APC because the future of Ndigbo was bright in the new party.
Speaking in Atlanta at a town hall meeting of the Imo State Congress of America – 2013 National Convention, he said “APC remains the best vehicle to promote the interest of our people. PDP has marginalised the South East and has nothing to show for all its years in power,” he said.
He urged all Igbos to join the APC, which he noted guarantees equity and political opportunities denied by the ruling party.
Okorocha added that “The purported action of a faction of APGA is of little political consequence as the party lacks the national spread to ensure the Igbo make significant headway in the political leadership of the nation
DailyPost

Michael Irene: Obahiagbon and his Political Grammar of Comedy


By on August 6, 2013


After the absurd political drama acted by Rotimi Amaechi, Rivers State governor and Goodluck Jonathan, the President of Nigeria presented itself to Nigerians in the middle of 2013, the citizens were inundated with news about the saga. They debated, cried and scolded these leaders in clear terms. However, Chief of State to the Edo State Governor, Honourable Patrick Obahiagbon, saw this as an avenue to engage Nigerians in his political grammar of comedy. In his arguments, broadcasted on Channels Television some weeks ago, he used words like Krinkum KraKrum (my emphasis), kakitomoboplutocracy, just to mention those two, to define the unfolding drama.
Obahiagbon gained prominence some time in 2009 in a debate at the house of assembly, when he spat these words: “It would be sardonic, lugubrious, and it would be a state of dismal-abysmal if parliament does not rise this morning to fix culpability where culpability is.” This sudden fame got into our honourable which made him display more grammatical acrobatics. In a NTA interview some years ago, when the interviewer asked, ‘so in essence, what challenge are you giving to your other colleagues? Obahiagbon replied: ‘Sactas Simplicitas. They must avoid regular big stouting. suyaing and peppersouping. Those are not the real issues. They must be prepared to immerse themselves in societal dialectics.’
Obahiagbon is a lawyer by profession and a staunch supporter of the poor masses. For every time he appears on any platform he talks fervently about how to help the “hoi polloi” and most importantly, pleads with the government or individuals in political positions “to achieve good results.” In addition, he is a lover of words. Obahiagbon takes his time to learn new words from Latin to English, blends languages to coin fresh words and is unapologetic when he uses them. Afterall, “ his intention is not to obfuscate the listener.”
This gift has earned him a lot of fans. Some of his fans claim he fills them with laughter, others say they learn new words and some simply see him as a clown. Whether you see him as a clown or take him seriously, Obahiagbon is here to stay. The question, therefore, is: Do we continue to laugh when he speaks? Or ask him to speak in a way the ordinary Nigerian can understand?
Sometimes, he goes on and on vibrating in the rivers of his words and at the top of his voice. Whenever he speaks, people rush to listen, laugh and nothing else. Nothing. His words have no impact (one of the reasons why he lost the Edo state primary elections?). If communication is ‘a symbolic process whereby reality is produced, maintained, repaired, and transformed’ he has simply distorted our reality with his grandiloquence.
One may define Obahiagbon with Alexander Pope’s words as follows: “They are bookful blockheads, ignorantly read. There have always been literate ignoramuses who have read too widely and not well.” An individual’s ability to use “big” words while speaking does not make you literate or wise. Effective communication is attained when the receiver of the information can digest and understand the speaker/writer without trouble.
In a country where over half of the citizens are illiterate, where education is almost dead and people rarely read, it is surprising, therefore, to see/hear an individual choose to speak like this.
On the other side of these grammatical gyrations, the advantages crouch there. First, in the midst of sad events that dot our milieu, we can all laugh when a politician opens his mouth. To attend a Nigerian comedy show could be expensive and for laughter we can now turn to our honourable which would save us some cost. Thank you.
However, Obahiagbon knows his people and his people know him. How many percent think he is a clown? And how many people think he should desist from communicating in such a way? How many people feel the grammar in the man makes the man? A vote perhaps? Or should we over look his excesses and appreciate the fact that we can laugh away our problems?
By Michael Irene, moshoke@yahoo.com
DailyPost

President Jonathan demands retraction of demeaning newspaper report

 

The mischievous lead report in the Peoples Daily newspaper today that President Goodluck Jonathan sought to visit former President Ibrahim Babangida in Minna to show him “the spirit of comradeship” during Ramadan is completely untrue.
Although President Jonathan participates in the Ramadan fast every year in solidarity with Nigerians of the Islamic faith, he has never as Vice President or President of the country visited the residence of any individual to break his fast.
Rather, it has been the President’s custom to regularly invite Moslems from all strata of society to break their fast with him at the Presidential Villa during the month of Ramadan.
In keeping with that established practice, President Jonathan has been busy hosting Moslems, most evenings of the current Ramadan season.
As much as he respects and holds former President Babangida in high regard, President Jonathan has never indicated any interest in visiting him at Minna during the current Ramadan.
Therefore, there could not have been any “turning down” of a visit by President Jonathan by the former president.
We condemn the decision of the editors of the Peoples Daily to publish such arrant falsehood in spite of our vigorous rebuttal as a further manifestation of a continuing effort to sow the seeds of discord in the polity.
Although the newspaper cites a phantom “reliable presidency source” and “a source close to the former president” to buttress its fictitious report, the editors of Peoples Daily know fully well that they can never prove the veracity of the false claim that President Jonathan either offered to break fast with General Babangida in Minna or was turned down by the former president.
We therefore demand a full retraction of the totally false report which demeans the Office of the President of the Federal Republic of Nigeria and an apology by the newspaper.
Reuben Abati
Special Adviser to the President
(Media & Publicity)
August 6, 2013
DailyPost

Monday, 5 August 2013

Recipe For Survival

By Olugu Olugu Orji mnia

30 May 1999 was a Sunday. An event happened that day at the International Conference Centre Abuja. A Christian Thanksgiving Service held to celebrate Olusegun Obasanjo who had been sworn in 24 hours earlier as Nigeria’s President. In attendance was an intimidating array of ‘men of God’ brandishing all manner of titles and accoutrements. This was supposed to be their day and they left no one in doubt of that fact.



There were two in this illustrious company that, for me, stood out. Archbishop (as he was at the time) John Onaiyekan of the Catholic Archdiocese of Abuja and Pastor William Folorunsho Kumuyi: General Superintendent of the Deeper Life Bible Church. Onaiyekan was one of the few who did not shy away from using the pulpit to condemn the excesses of military rule especially during the dark and dangerous days of General Sani Abacha. The broad smile he wore that day hinted at how personally he took the unfolding events in the polity. Kumuyi on the other hand was probably the most apolitical pastor of his time. Since he burst of the stage of national reckoning in the 80s, he had been singularly focused on minding the welfare of his ever-increasing flock. This man had successfully avoided controversy and everything with even the slightest hint of the political. His presence therefore was evidently a huge but welcome surprise.

For me, seeing the two men rekindled hope that Nigeria was once more on the path to recovery. Having hope makes me feel really good and our romance dates right back to the events leading up to the Biafran War in the later 70s.

Though I was but a little child, I knew something was amiss when my kid brother was born in the last quarter of 1966 in Ikot Ekpene. When you see elders withdraw to speak in hushed tones, you know it is no longer at ease.

My suspicions were confirmed when the family had to make a dash to Aba at night. A few weeks later, we were again bundled off to Ohafia where it became abundantly clear that war was imminent. Then the talk of Aburi filled the air. I did not even know that Aburi was a place in Ghana because I saw it as a possibility of avoiding war. Even before full-scale hostilities, the family already recorded monumental losses so it was easy to imagine what the real thing would entail. No, I did not want war like millions of other Nigerians so Aburi presented huge hope.

That hope was dashed and we have 30 months of needless orgy to show for our failure to pull away from the brink.

Hope again came calling in 1993 when Moshood Kashimawo Olawale Abiola, despite his dubious past, helped galvanize Nigerians in his convoluted bid to become president. Hope ’93 held the possibility that Nigerians were ready for the arduous task of nation-building in spite of ethnic and religious differences. Abiola never became president and our hopes were dashed: mine was crushed.

Standing on the foyer of the International Conference Centre Abuja that fateful Sunday morning, I was compelled to remold hope; desperately praying that Obasanjo will not make my efforts to end catastrophically.

Catastrophe is a dignified word to describe Obasanjo’s 8-year ruthless rigmarole. Hope was now indescribably mangled. You would say I lost hope but what I actually did was to cast her away. Now rid of her, I meant to live life as normally as I could manage. It did not take long to discover that without hope, life and sanity are imperiled.

Without hope, I suddenly discovered that my life was ebbing away and my sanity was becoming severely strained. Frantically, I sought her out once more and went through another grueling session of reconstruction. Afterwards I made a radical decision to remove my focus from politics and economics. Now I invest heavily in family, music and a unique form of literary evangelism, and trust me, investing in these areas hardly bring disappointment and frustration.

The Good Book says in very contemporary English, “Unrelenting disappointment (hope deferred) leaves you heartsick, but a sudden good break can turn life around.”* As a veteran of hope and the heartbreak of hope, I can affirm the truth of this scripture. When your hope is constantly and consistently dashed, you put your sanity and very life at grave risk.

So here is a survivor’s honest counsel: stop investing in the possibility of political and economic miracles. You only make yourself a certain target for heartbreak. If some politician has promised you fresh air, go immediately and buy a gas mask. If fresh air does come, you can sell the mask to a Syrian or Israeli even at a profit. If the fresh air does not materialize, you are going to die a very slow and painful death. Trust me; asphyxia is not the prettiest route to the hereafter.

Maybe an economic shaman is peddling the certain imminence of a national and global boom that will usher in a regime of peace and prosperity, and you are buying. If I were you, I’ll be familiarizing with tips for surviving an impending economic holocaust.

So don’t lose hope: just find something enduring to invest it in. Maybe this is the best time to find God in a very personal way: not the commercial version that resembles an ecclesiastical supermarket. You can rediscover family life and the thrills of belonging. Watch your boy become a man and your daughters transform into delectable maidens. Keenly observe as your spouse gracefully ages. Monitor a seed you planted in your garden grow to bear many more seeds.

Invest your hope in these ventures and it will never be dashed. Then you can live long and stay healthy and sane.

*(Prov. 13:12 from THE MESSAGE: The Bible in Contemporary Language © 2002 by Eugene H. Peterson)

OLUGU OLUGU ORJI mnia
nnanta2012@gmail.com
Saharareporters