Wednesday, 7 August 2013

FEC meeting cancelled

 by: Augustine Ehikioya


 
The Federal Executive Council (FEC) meeting normally presided over by the President or Vice President could not hold at the Presidential Villa, Abuja on Wednesday.
No official reason was given for the cancellation of the meeting.
The Secretary to the Government of the Federation (SGF), Anyim Pius Anyim, who heads the Council Secretariat, had late Tuesday issued a circular to the various ministries on  the cancellation of  the  meeting.
President Goodluck Jonathan was in Lagos on Wednesday  to condole with Lagos State Governor, Babatunde Fashola, while Vice President Namadi Sambo, who went to Saudi Arabia for Umra (lesser hajj), was due back to Nigeria Tuesday night.
 
TheNation

APC: We don’t have leaders yet – Akande

 


BISI AKANDE
Chief Akande speaking…yesterday. Listening are (from left) Deputy National Chairman South, Senator Annie Okonkwo, National Secretary Tijani Tumsa and Masari
All Progressives Congress (APC) has declared that it’s yet to choose its leaders, barely one week after its registration. Also, the party said it would field a candidate for the Anambra governorship election scheduled for November 16.
Speaking during a press briefing yesterday in Abuja, acting national chairman of the party and former chairman of the defunct Action Congress of Nigeria (ACN), Chief Bisi Akande, said leaders of the party would emerge between November and December. The party also said that it would soon announce the date for its congresses in Anambra to elect the state leadership of the party.
On the leadership of the party, Akande stated that since the party has just been officially recognised by INEC it has not constituted its leadership.
He stated: “We are new, and therefore, the leadership of the party has not been constituted. I would use this opportunity to let you know that anybody claiming or parading as the leader of the party is not true or genuine. “
Our party has just been registered and we are yet to have our congress where our leaders would be elected. But that would be between November and December this year. In the interim, we have worked out plans to conduct the Anambra congress to elect the leadership of the party in the state to make sure we participate in the gubernatorial election.
“But right now, let nobody relate with the party for the media unless through Alhaji Lai Mohammed. He is the one we have mandated in the mean time to represent us. So anybody in the media that needs information on the APC should contact Mohammed and no other person.”
Akande also gave assurance that although the APC is new, it is, in the real sense, an old party that was awaiting legal endorsement.
“These parties in the alliance have been likeminds that worked together in the past; so we are not strangers to each other or in conflict when it comes to principles.
“We know each other and would also encourage other politicians and Nigerians to join us in making the nation’s politics more robust.
“We are open to all Nigerians and after the leadership of the party is constituted, we would commence membership drive to enlarge the house and make it the real mega party we planned from time.”
OsunDefender

Two-Party System Will Deepen Nigeria’s Democracy – Bisi Akande

 


BISI AKANDE
APC INTERIM NATIONAL CHAIRMAN, BISI AKANDE
The interim national chairman of the All Progressives’ Congress (APC), Chief Bisi Akande said running a two party system will deepen the Nigeria’s democracy.
The elder statesman said while addressing a news conference in Abuja, after the newly registered mega party chieftains converged at the party’s secretariat for its inaugural meeting.
Chief Akande reaffirmed the ideological position of the party saying the party exists for the sake of the people, while explaining the role of the party.
He also announced the establishment of a committee to mobilize Nigerians to embrace the new party ahead of its national convention.
Meanwhile, at a separate meeting in Lafia, the Nasarawa state capital, Governor Tanko Al-Makura speaks on the merger of the three main opposition parties into the all progressive congress.
The governor said the merger is aimed at providing credible leadership for the country.
Passing as the first successful merger of political parties in Nigeria’s history since 1914, the political strength of the APC will be felt, come November at the Anambra governorship election.
CHANNELSTV

APC ready for PDP, other defectors, says Akande

 
APC ready for PDP, other defectors, says Akande
•Chief Akande speaking...yesterday. Listening are (from left) Deputy National Chairman South, Senator Annie Okonkwo, National Secretary Tijani Tumsa and Masari

APC ready for PDP, other defectors, says Akande

Buhari: I’ll run if APC approves
Masari heads committee
Progressives took a major step yesterday in strengthening their new baby.
They set up a committee, headed by former House of Representatives Speaker Aminu Bello Masari, to build a structure for the All Progressives Congress (APC).
The National Chairman of the party’s Interim National Executive Committee, Chief Bisi Akande, broke the news.
But he disappointed those eager to know the party’s presidential and governorship candidates for the 2015 polls.
He said the party was ready to draw members from all groups, including the Peoples Democratic Party (PDP).
He said if President Goodluck Jonathan was fed up with the crisis in PDP, he is free to join the APC.
Akande, who spoke at a briefing after the maiden meeting of the APC Interim NEC in Abuja, admitted that Nigeria was politically drifting towards a two-party system.
He said: “We listened to some people talking about presidency, talking about governors; we have not reached that stage at all. Our major preoccupation is to set up the structure of our party – the All Progressives Congress.
“It is after that, maybe in November or December when we hold our national convention where our national executives will be elected; there is no idea about who becomes president or who becomes a governor.
“But the only exemption is Anambra State where the committee is already working on that.
“We are going to register our members in Anambra State, we are going to conduct congresses and we are going to elect a candidate that will contest on the platform of the All Progressives Congress. I think these are the very few things I have to tell you that we did at today’s meeting.”
Akande said several committees were set up to advise the party on how to go about the elections in some states, such as Anambra and Delta as well as some local government elections in Kwara, Anambra, Cross River, Enugu and other places.
He did not state the timeline for the committees, but said they would soon report back.
“If you know the INEC timetable you will appreciate that we are going to work within that frame work and we are going to be ready. Before INEC closes their door to nomination in Anambra State, we would almost have finished,” Akande said.
He said the party has banned those arrogating to themselves some political offices or positions when the APC structure is yet to be erected.
He added: “You know, political parties are in contest to win elections and the APC has come to demonstrate that to the good people of Nigeria.
“And in doing so the only thing that we think is creating some misunderstanding is that people are anxious to be part of APC.
“But because the party has not been given the directive, some people are just talking on behalf of the party. We are putting a stop to that. Any statement about the party should emanate from the Publicity Secretary of APC and that is Alhaji Lai Mohammed. And whatever he tells you, you should know it is the mind and decision of the All Progressives Congress.
“We are warning people that are arrogating to themselves chairmanship of APC in the state or in the local government, they are all unauthorised. All those who are printing papers, printing forms, calling rallies in the states in the name of APC; they are not yet authorised.
“The authority will soon begin to flow down from the national level to the state level, and to local government. And when it is going to be done, the National Publicity Secretary will keep you informed.”
Masari is heading the committee to advise the party on its structure.
He said the mobilisation of members into the new party will begin from the bottom to the top and the membership would be thrown open to all Nigerians, including President Goodluck Jonathan.
He said: “We have just finished the first meeting after the INEC registration of the merger of the five committees that came together. And we know our duty as the Interim Leadership of the APC is to mobilise people into APC. Our duty is to register members into the party.
“Our duty is to stage congresses, from ward level to local government level, at state level and at the national level. It is to hold a convention to establish a proper structure for the All Progressives Congress. And until that is done, we are having the party in the interim. I hope you will understand that.”
He said: “As for the second question, the ideological position. We have what you call a manifesto, which we have just written. But that manifesto needs a lot of fine-tuning. Not only that, it needs a lot of reduction into bullet points.
“By the time we reduce our manifesto into bullet points, it won’t be difficult for Nigerians to appreciate the ideology the APC represents. And that is the ideology of existing for the sake of the people and not for selfish aggrandisement of the resources of the nation to a few leadership. We are going to make that clear shortly. By the attitude of our 11 governors in their various states by what they are doing, you would have seen that there is a difference between the APC and the PDP.”
Asked to be specific on the number of parties that merged to become APC, Akande added: “The parties that held conventions to merge are the Action Congress of Nigeria, the CPC and the ANPP. Those three parties went to a convention to specify that they want to merge into APC. But a chunk of APGA has indicated their membership, that they are going to join APC. And almost the entire DPP have indicated that they are coming to join the APC.
“And we are not closing our doors to PDP. If Jonathan is tired of the crisis in the PDP, he is welcome in the APC.”
Responding to a question, Akande admitted that the nation is politically drifting towards a two-party system.
He said: “This is the first-ever merger in the history of Nigeria’s democracy. There should be a two-party system so that the country will have a choice between a bad government and a good one. It is going to deepen the democracy best.
“There are more than 40 parties in the register of parties in England but you have only two or three operating now. Ditto in America; you have only two (the Democratic Party and The Republican).
“It doesn’t mean that there are no other parties that are not showing their heads. But their democracy is very respectable because they have created a choice between two alternatives.
“In our own, we didn’t even know which one was a better party before but from now on it is not difficult for Nigerians to know which party has been inflicting pains on them in the last 14 years and which party is poised to relieve them of these pains.”
On what APC would do if the court reverses the decision of the Independent National Electoral Commission to register it and favour a rival African Peoples Congress, Akande said there is no cause for alarm.
He added: “The first question is hypothetical and I will not answer it. In Nigeria today, I don’t know any other APC besides this All Progressives Congress. And we don’t contemplate anything and nothing will happen to move this APC out of place. We remain a party and we shall remain a party forever to rule this country, Nigeria.
Regarding threats by APGA to sue APC, he said: “APGA never said it was going to sue my party for any amount. APGA said it was going to sue Governor Fashola of Lagos State, so I can’t answer for him.”
TheNation

Tuesday, 6 August 2013

Growing Pains - Hannatu Musawa


 
Most parents of adolescent children will identify with the fact that it is a time of change and challenge for all involved. Due to hormonal changes in their body, an adolescent mood may swing from admirable behavior to a despicable show of rudeness at home and in public. A great number of problems encountered with parents and teens are attitude problems, underage drinking, drug abuse, drunk driving, bullying, rebellious behavior, smoking, peer pressure, body issues and lying.
These problems can be overwhelming for many parents. To nag, yell or threaten are definitely not the best approaches to addressing a troubled teen. Because modern day parents are extremely busy, other productive strategies have to be used to deal with children. It helps to exercise an unbelievable amount of patience and be able to think practically and strategically. It is understandable though that parents become confused and frustrated and at a loss at how to react to these problems. We as parents may become irrational and emotional; the first instinct is to lash out negatively. This in turn results in verbal or even physical abuse between parent and child; and if these scenes for one reason or the other continue to escalate, then a parent would be forced to admit that a losing battle is being fought without a victor.
In Nigeria, adolescents react to rapid changes to the environment. These changes affect the society in major ways as 43% of the Nigerian population comprise of adolescent children (Bamgbose, 2002). When adults are not properly educated or morally sound, these characteristics are usually always passed down to the children. Adolescent children can be said to be relating to a person who is in transition to acquire biological features peculiar to the adult population group. This period of life between childhood and adolescents refers to teenage children between thirteen to eighteen years of age. This period is described by specialists as a turbulent period of overwhelming stress. There are physical traits associated with adolescents such as profuse perspiration and body odour (if hygiene is not prioritized), enormous  appetites, skin problems that can be acne related, social awkwardness, curiosity about sexuality, self-consciousness, feeling lazy or lethargic and disruptive and sometimes aggressive behavior.
With these barrage of problems, it is paramount and necessary for parents to enlighten themselves on issues that maybe plaguing their children and interact with them as much as possible; or as much as time will allow. Many parents mistake for example doing homework or going to the church/ mosque as interacting optimally with their children- this is not the solution. Interacting with your children by participating in activities that they enjoy such as football, swimming, movies etc. is so much more productive to both parties. Engaging your child in a project they find interesting will bridge a strong foundational bond that will serve as a lasting understanding even in times that you or them become frustrated. Some parents feel utterly lost as to how to tackle adolescent children; especially if the aggression or hostility being shown by them is not related to physical abuse or an alcohol or substance abuse problem.
At this point its very important that parents distinguish between the “normal” teenage mood swings and rebellion from signs of actual depression. Even though depression may occur at any age, it can affect adolescents more than it does younger children. These depressive symptoms can appear at the age of 13 but more often 16 and 24. Unfortunately, depression is very difficult to detect in adolescents; especially due to the fact that they don’t open up so easily due to insecurities. Dr Michael Miller, editor in chief of the “Harvard Mental Health Letter”, says experts have identified certain characteristics that distinguish mood swings from depression in adolescents. They are:
  • Severity: The more pronounced the symptoms (changes in mood, behaviours, feelings, thoughts), the more likely that the problem is depression and not a passing mood.
  • Duration: Any deterioration in behavior or mood that lasts two weeks or longer, without a break, may indicate depression.
  • Domains: Problems noticed in several areas of a teen’s functioning- at home, in school, and in interactions with friends- may indicate depression.
The first step to helping your child is to recognize and accept the fact that they even have a problem. Encourage your child to to also identify what is happening to them; so that you may assure them that they will not be alone in tackling the issues at hand. Educate your child in ways to cope with problems; model appropriate behavior for them to follow. Support them towards maintaining a healthy lifestyle; for example enough sleep, exercise and eating proper balanced meals. Adolescents should also be motivated towards taking preventative steps through creativity and being involved in interactive activities. One of my traditions has been to make children socially responsible by giving them practical lessons. Teach your child to feel empathy towards the less privileged, orphans and disabled. I embark upon community service with my daughter, nieces and nephews from their foundational years; to ensure they develop a high level of empathy for the less fortunate in the community. I often point out almajiris that walk under the basking hot sun without even slippers on their tiny worn feet or any proper clothing. Engage them in interactive problem solving, “If you were President, what would you do to ensure that all children are safe and properly cared for?” Or “How many different policies would you suggest to ensure that child trafficking stops and all children have an equal opportunity to go to school?” This question can be posed to the older children.
While teenage mood swings can be very difficult to deal with, it is important that parents give support to their children. Do your best to understand what that child is feeling; take a mental time travelling machine to remember how strange many things may have seem to you at that age. Most teenagers find it excruciatingly difficult to talk to their parents about their feelings. Focus on the fact that your priority should be to help shape your child into a productive and self-sufficient adult.
It may take the last drop of patience you have but resist the temptation to address temperamental mood swings by lashing out in anger or annoyance. Do not take any negative behavior personally by being a bully instead of a parent with great inspiration and advice. Be observant of your child’s mood and ensure that when they are upset or in pain you are there for a shoulder to lean or cry on. When you child does well reward them with love and recognition instead of material gifts for many parents are unwittingly guilty of showering their children with too many gifts. You time and attention is far more valuable in the long run than the latest ipod or PS3.
The fact that you are raising a young adult is challenging but should not have to be a nightmare. Do the best that you can like many parents; and it is a guarantee that the impact of your influence will shine like a bright light through your child. One day the thought of growing pains will be a distant and fond memory.
Saharareporters

Lagbaja Responds To Okey Ndibe On “Mumudom''




Lágbájá
 
Dear Okey Ndibe: Thank you for sounding the alarm in a way that should make us reflect deeper. Mumu is not a condition I proudly proclaim. It was with a heavy heart that I came to this shocking realization that we are indeed a country of mumus. Harsh as it might sound, no other explanation would suffice. It is apparent that the "leaders" know that they would always get away with whatever incredible schemes they concoct because, amongst other reasons,
(a) the mumu people they "lead" are no different from their mumu "leaders" in character
(b) the mumu people are gullible, superstitious and naive
(c) there are no consequences for criminal acts if you belong to the right group
(d) these mumus never demand accountability from their "leaders"
(e) the mumus expect their rulers to loot or would otherwise consider them foolish
Apologies for the seeming overgeneralization but the vast majority runs with this mumu mindset.
There is a limit to how much one can squeeze into a song before sounding less music than sermon. Please permit me to expatiate using your perimeter of "recent events in the past week or two".
For simplicity I would use a numbered list to analyze and highlight a few seemingly disparate but absurd mumurity examples and indicators.
1. 5 members trying to impeach a governor would make you think there are probably only 6 or 7 members of the House of Assembly. According to the assembly's website there are 31 members. For mumus, 5 out 31 constitutes a majority.
2. In the land of mumus you can make your own mace and confer it with automatic authority, elect a "new Speaker" and swear him in.
3. No single hospital in Nigeria to entrust the unfortunately injured member with. He had to be flown to the UK.
4. Flown abroad ... likely on tax payers' account
5. Treated ... likely on tax payers' account
6. Visited by officials... likely on tax payers' account (business or first class tickets?)
7. Nyesom Wike the Minister of State who led the visit was until recently the Governor's (Amaechi's) Chief of Staff. He was allegedly nominated for the Ministerial position by Governor Amaechi.
8. Shouldn't the mumus wonder how Nyesom Wike as Minister of State for Education found the time for this all important trip while abandoning his post in spite of the raging crisis in his ministry with the Academic staff union of Nigerian universities currently on strike? Well the mumu staff and students can rot in hell I guess.
9. Madam Patience would probably have "visited" too, if not for the noise such would generate. So for now, the victim suffers alone.
10. The erstwhile pontificating police boss of the State could not find the patient's prominent attacker for over a week.
11. Madam Patience having first denied any involvement in the crisis while verbally attacking Soyinka, eventually owns up "pouring out her grievances".
12. She owns up to a group of visiting Bishops who came on a peace making mission to find a lasting solution to the crisis in their region. Religion is always an easy scapegoat and tool of deception in mumudom.
13. Why would you even think that the Bishops would go back empty handed? Any "transport fare/thank-you-for-coming", if received, would have likely been financed on tax payers' account.
14. And why are we ranting about "tax payers"? Why are the tax payers not furious over the incessant misappropriation and misapplication of their hard earned contributions? The answer lies in the question... Aside from PAYE, how many are compliant in mumudom?
15. First a set of 5 Governors and 3 Deputy Governors (representing their respective Governors), left their duty posts for a solidarity visit with the embattled Governor of Rivers State... of course to the detriment of tax payers. (a) They were not on leave, but left urgent work and duties behind for the "emergency" solidarity visit. (b) Flight to and fro Port Harcourt of course likely on tax payers' account.
16. They were closely followed by a second set of 4 commiserating sympathetic Governors. Of course, again likely on tax payers' account.
17. Madam Patience's grievance, as she divulged to the visiting Bishops, started when Governor Amaechi refused to be governed by her, as he would not listen to her veiled orders on how to govern the State... which incidentally is her primary territory being her State of origin. Mumus have no problem with that, fully being in harmony with her as she sings as first lady in Abuja while simultaneously dancing in absentia as Permanent Secretary in Bayelsa and conducting the orchestra in home state, Rivers.
18. Madam ends her confession to the Bishops by saying that Amaechi is her son as she is obviously the mother of everyone in mumudom. The question all mumus should ask is, "Would a good mother promote the demise of her child?"
19. Where was her outraged sense of motherhood when Senators were busy voting to turn mumudom into a Nation of pedophiliacs at the expense of her innocent "daughters"?
20. Where was her outraged sense of "mother of the Nation" when the video of 5 gang rapists went viral. Has she used that "mother of the Nation" power to find the culprits? Not a priority in mumudom.
21. Where was her outraged "motherhood of mumudom" when 46 school children were murdered in Yobe? Indeed the whole Nation of mumus have just gone on with their more important mumu lives like nothing happened.
22. Which brings us to the insane mumurity that gives the "leaders" confidence to try pranks such as the attempt at crafting the under age marriage law, knowing that with the mumus... "nothing go happen"
23. In the land of mumus, the rulers know they can always throw in the religious card, so Senator Yerima leads the child slavery onslaught with the religious chant.
24. While all this was going on, 79 year old OPC founder, Dr. Fasheun was, in his own description, "delivering" Mustapha to Kano.
25. Soon after, Gumsu Sani Abacha had the courage to rant on social media about her proud heritage... because with the mumus who his father savagely ruled over... nothing go happen.
26. Gumsu even called Soyinka who was a victim of her beloved dad's misrule, "Mad empty Professor" ... because in mumudom, "nothing go happen".
27. Final scores... Jang 13, Amaechi 19, but in the land of mumus Mathematics has a different interpretation for 13 is greater than 19. Even the President of the mumus ratifies that.
28. By the way, both Governors Jang and Amaechi are from the same imploding political party.
29. Jang says he is old enough to be Amaechi's father... a common escape route that is often quickly bought by the mumu populace. Old enough to be the President's pawn and to upturn justice might be more like it. Only possible when you know for sure that your people are mumus... Nothing go happen.
30. The Governor is supposed to be the chief security officer of his State, but apparently in mumudom, his Police Commissioner is his boss.
31. The Governor's security staff could be so easily withdrawn because nothing is institutionalized in a Nation of mumus. The loyalty of the security personnel is not based on the constitution but on personal or maternal affiliations. The mumus keep watching because "it does not concern me o"... "Big men and women are fighting". Same way the injustice of the Nation's attorney general's assassination does not concern them.
32. Most reports in the Nigerian media kept referring to the self appointed Speaker as if he were truly the substantive Speaker. A mere use of "self-acclaimed" would have been logical, but they were already calling him the Speaker because... ignorance? inducement? resignation to the belief that the 5 vs 26 Assembly coup was already a done deal?
33. While all this drama unfolded, Nigeria, like the proverbial head-burying ostrich felt it had the moral right to insist on democratic processes in Egypt.
34. Sahara Reporters had screamed about the underhand conspiracy to proclaim Mustapha "not guilty". Mumus simply went about their daily mumurity unperturbed because "it doesn't concern them". And when it happened as predicted... no problem. Mumus continue dem jolly as if nothing happened.
35. Meanwhile, Daniel and his political supporters carried their politics into the house of God at Rueben Abati's mother's funeral service... simply because there is no true reverence for God. Religion is a safe hiding cave. The mumus in the congregation would never protest such sacrilege because... "it is not strange" as the houses of God are now also political grounds. Obasanjo built one in Abeokuta. Jonathan got one built in Otuoke.
36. Meanwhile, some other mumus were again busy putting the Nation to international shame. In unprecedented match fixing fiascos, Police Machine beat Bubayaro 67-0 while Plateau United Feeders beat Akurba FC 79-0. Just in case you are confused, the game was soccer, not basketball.
37. The matches were to determine which one of the two tied teams would be promoted into... wait for this... just the 3rd division of the Nigerian soccer league. How many goals would they have to orchestrate when they want promotion to the 1st division?
38. Interesting to note that one of the teams involved in these shows of shame, the Police Machine, represents the Police Force. Now who would investigate this scandal?
39. Mumus involved in the conspiracy had to include players... team management... referees and other match officials... spectators??? That is quite a large mumu cooperative.
40. Since four teams were involved, multiply the number of conspirators by 4 (except match officials and spectators which should be multiplied by "only" 2). Hence, the scam was done in the open. It was a confident public show of shame. No... two confident simultaneous scams. No problem as corruption is everywhere.
41. Before the matches, Police Machine and Plateau United were level on points, goal difference and goals scored, and each was playing its final match which would determine which team would get elevated into the 3rd division league. Plateau United scored 72 of its 79 goals in the second half, thereby averaging more than one goal per minute. This would necessarily include the time needed to celebrate each goal, retrieve the ball, bring it back to the center, wait for the referee's whistle before kicking off again.... after each goal. 72 times. Or did they just write the preferred figures as we typically do on election day?
42. Is it not curious that neither of the two losing teams could manage a single consolation goal? What else are we if not mumus?
43. Then there was the innocent man who was freed by the high court in Owerri after having been unjustly incarcerated for seven years, "awaiting trial". No compensation... nobody held accountable for his ordeal. He insisted on being taken back to the prison as that was his only guaranty of a roof over his head and a daily meal. It was merely a "small thing" in the daily bizarre news as mumus went about their daily mumurity with their typical mentality of "e no concern me".
44. Remember that this is mostly a snippet of the past two weeks or so. But there is more... 20 year old Chijioke Nwankor allegedly rapes a 9 year old pupil to death in Calabar. Reportedly in his own words, he asked her to bend down in the uncompleted building because it was too dirty to lie down as the place was being used as a public toilet. That is mumudom parlance for faeces shamelessly defecated all over the ground. Could the defecation be by aliens from outer space?
45. Well... thankfully, there is always a little ray of sunlight sneaking through the dark jungle. A Briton who was kidnapped by an armed gang shortly after arrival in Lagos, has been released.
...All in just the past two weeks or so in mumudom.
Excuse me, I have to return to work. I need to earn £3000 for my British visa. Wait a minute, did I tell you I am still a Commonwealth citizen?
Saharareporters

Nigeria As Lagbaja’s Perfect Mumudom, By Okey Ndibe

The masked phenomenon known simply as Lagbaja is one of the few Nigerian musicians whose art is inspired by the late Fela Anikulapo-Kuti.

In keeping with the Felaian spirit, Lagbaja’s act and art combine prodigious, heart-thumping entertainment with a political message that, at its eloquent best, has the powerful effect of summing up the Nigerian “condition.”
Fela, for example, flung the word “zombie” in our faces. In the heydays of military rule, when our uniformed men exhibited the complex of mini, mindless gods – flinging the lash at hapless civilians or shooting at the slightest provocation – Fela’s term captured that syndrome of senseless, rampaging power.
The way Fela deployed the word was deeply penetrating.
“Zombie” entered Nigerians’ social lexicon, a handy word for all battered or potentially battered subjects of military despotism. The word entrenched itself as the most natural way to describe the military honchos who ruled (and ruined) us.
It also described the antics of the uniformed minions who – forgetting that they were victims of misrule – seemed ever willing to keep the rest of us in line, to still voices of dissent, to serve any regime with rabid, ferocious efficiency.
Fela also gave us “ITT,” deconstructing the name of an international telecommunications corporation headed by the late Moshood Kashimawo Abiola to yield a new term: “International Thief Thief.”
His song, “Beast of No Nation,” proclaimed the collective bastardry of the Nigerian society just as his “Overtake Don Overtake Overtake” (ODOO) is a shorthand for anomie.
Today, it is Lagbaja, I suggest, who has offered us the handiest name for our collective malady.
In a recent song that should become as much an anthem as Fela’s “Zombie,” Lagbaja famously calls Nigerians 200 million mumu. The word mumu is a quintessentially Nigerian word, its rich inflections and negative connotations derived from its pedigree. It translates (rather prosaically) as a fool, a buffoon, a person susceptible to scams and other forms of trickery.
In the lyrics, Lagbaja names some of the big men who have shaped – that is to say, misshaped – Nigeria: Ibrahim Babangida, Sani Abacha, and Olusegun Obasanjo.
But there’s an unusual, jolting twist in the song.
As the listener settles to it, expecting to hear the familiar “yabis” – words of insults usually lobbed at the country’s past and present misrulers – Lagbaja turns his barbed tongue on the so-called “ordinary” Nigerian, the “followers.”
In his worldview, all Nigerians are part and parcel of the fabric of corruption and oppression that the unfortunate among us bemoan.
In Chinua Achebe’s fourth novel, A Man of the People, one of the characters earns a chilly, censorious look when he teases the ill-educated, prototypically corrupt politician, Chief M.A. Nanga, with an old joke: “MA, minus opportunity.”
Lagbaja uses a similar linguistic move on all of us. Nigerians, all of us, are corrupt – he seems to say – minus opportunity.
At any rate, Lagbaja sees the lot us as mumu, collaborators in our own oppression and debasement, architects of our collective misfortune.
At first glance, Lagbaja’s would appear to be a harsh, excessive and even misplaced indictment. But it’s hard to deny that there’s a vital sense in which the musician is right on target.
In fact, it’s impossible to undertake any retrospective of events in Nigeria without coming to the conclusion that too many Nigerians act as fertilizers for the malaise that plagues and wrecks their lives.
Let’s take some of the recent events from the past week or two.
We’ve watched – some riveted with peculiar glee – as politicians from Rivers State darted onto the stage to offer us a veritable theater of the absurd.
In an act of particular impunity, four or five members of the state assembly attempted to stage a spurious impeachment of the speaker and to replace him with one of their number. Backed by powerful politicians in Abuja (including, some suggest, President Goodluck Jonathan and his wife), these legislative renegades were prepared to act on the proposition that they outnumbered 27 or so other lawmakers loyal to the speaker they sought to remove.
A physical fight ensued to settle this sordid, “political” arithmetic.
In the melee, one legislator seized a make-shift mace imported by the Abuja-backed renegades and used it to batter a colleague, Michael Chinda – a member of the Abuja Collective.
Numerous videos of the fracas have gone viral on youtube. In them, we see so-called lawmakers who should have been on Nigeria’s boxing team at the London Olympics.
We see the police at their inefficient worst, unable to control a rowdy gathering of thuggish legislators and their hired thugs. We see one of the lawmakers ready to kill or die because the state governor, Chibuike Rotimi Amaechi, had insulted his “mother,” aka Patience Jonathan, aka (the fuming pugilist’s) “Jesus Christ on earth.”
I wrote a few weeks ago that there was no substantive principle at play in the political crisis in Rivers State – or in any location in Nigeria, for that matter. It’s all a game about who gets to steal the most from the commonwealth and who gets to rape the people.
Neither faction in the dispute is actuated by the public good. Power, the acquisition of raw power for self-aggrandizement, is the governing motivation.
If Mrs. Jonathan now functions as divinity, a “Jesus Christ on earth,” then her husband, who fancies himself a “transformational leader,” must occupy a special seat in any gathering of leaders, dwarfing such figures as Barack Obama, David Cameron, Angela Merkel, and Paul Kagame.
Yet, the terribly injured Chinda could find no hospital within the precincts redeemed by Mrs. Jonathan and transformed by her husband for treatment. Instead, it was to Mr. Cameron’s Britain that the battered Chinda was flown for urgent surgery.
Here’s a safe bet: Mr. Chinda is not spending a penny of his money to pay his bills at the Bupa Cromwell Hospital in Britain. There’s a chance that the hospital demanded and received full payment before commencing treatment. At any rate, those bills will be paid with public funds, most likely provided by his sponsors in Abuja.
The arrangement makes a mumu of all of us who accept this daylight abuse of public resources.
Nigerian lawmakers, state as well as national, are paid obscene sums of money. Yet, they hardly ever use the instrument of the law to address the crises that menace the lives of Nigerians – including a non-existent healthcare system.
Instead, they gallivant, carouse, undertake meaningless jamborees in Nigeria and abroad, and – when it suits them – take to boxing. They hardly work, but when they fall sick, they travel to such addresses as Britain, Germany, South Africa and India where people work hard and use their brain power.
As if Chinda’s transfer to a British hospital was not wasteful enough, last week a group of his backers, including a junior minister, Nyesom Wike, flew to London to commiserate with him.
The odds are excellent that the government in Abuja paid for the flight tickets and hotel accommodation of the five or so well-wishers – to say nothing of spending cash. Mr. Wike and his team must not know how ludicrous they appear to their British hosts; they have no idea how the British would use them as the butt of jokes: Here are these Africans who have too much money but not a bit of sense to do anything for themselves!
It’s an altogether awful picture. I doubt that Mr. Chinda has sponsored a single bill that improved the lives of the people of Rivers State by a jot.
Instead, he lent himself as a stooge to carry out the designs of those in power in Abuja, determined to lay waste to his state. He is injured serving this despicable agenda. And then Nigerians, including the hapless people of his home state, must pay the tab for his treatment in London.
A statement released by Mr. Wike’s team underscored the ridiculousness of it all.
It began: “Prominent leaders of Rivers State from across political and professional divides on Saturday visited the member representing Obio/Akpor State Constituency 2 at the Bupa Cromwell Hospital in London, United Kingdom, where the legislator is recuperating from head and jaw surgeries carried out on him by medical experts in the health facility.”
Then it stated that “the leaders were grateful to God for the survival of Hon. Michael Chinda despite the vicious knocks he received from the mace-wielding Majority Leader of the Rivers State House of Assembly, Mr. Chidi Lloyd.”
These parasites, shameless consumers of other people’s products and enterprise, are the kind of characters who pass for “leaders” in Nigeria.
There are also figures like Ango Abdullahi, a saber rattling jingoist who insists that Nigeria’s presidency must be turned over to a “northerner” or there will be mayhem.
Even though Mr. Abdullahi wears the prefix of professor, he doesn’t evince any interest in stellar leadership. It suffices for him that somebody from the so-called North – any “northerner,” however mediocre or visionless – assume the presidential office.
It all boils down to clownishness. I’m with Lagbaja: the fact that the vast majority from all parts of Nigeria permit certifiable clowns to pollute and deform our lives makes us 200 million mumu inhabiting a perfect mumudom!
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