Karen’s Metamorphosis.

Fellow Nigerians, I think it is in order to congratulate ourselves for the way the BIG BROTHER AMPLIFIED was concluded last Sunday in South Africa. You must be wondering what is my own in this matter. A few readers even expressed their shock last week that someone of my status could find time for such frivolities as BIG BROTHER AMPLIFIED. One of such critics wrote that it was so unpresidential to write an article on a supposedly despicable girl as Karen. Their reasoning was that a presidential candidate should rise above the mundane things of life and concern himself only with serious and rigorous issues of life. It is predicated on a fallacy that he is no longer a regular human being and should not attempt to live the lives of normal people.

I beg to disagree. A major source of our problem in Nigeria is the way we idolise our leaders. We see and project them as demigods. Naturally, and somewhere along the line, they start to believe the myths of their hagiographic existence. Whether President or not, a good leader should not be far removed from the people. He must share in their hopes and aspirations. He should feel their frustrations and anguish. He must partake in their triumphs and jollifications. He must be seen to be human in all ramifications. I don’t aspire to be one of those leaders who don’t seem to live on our planet. I believe that is why they can have the unreasonable audacity to do what they do and think how awkwardly they think. I want to be as real as Karen, with all my foibles, warts and all.

As for me, and so many people I know, the BIG BROTHER AMPLIFIED as excellently packaged this season was a welcome distraction from the ugly developments in our dear country. It provided a wonderful escape to remote places like Iraq and Afghanistan. It was the addictive opium we needed to drown our sorrow. And we should be forgiven for seeking great relief from the migraine of everyday life in Nigeria. Response to my last article, The Karenplification of Africa, was awesome. I have been writing newspaper articles since 1986 and I must confess that this one on Karen generated more interests than any other. It broke all records. All you have to do is search for that article on Google. You will be amplified by the number of hits and commentaries. I met so many society ladies who ordinarily were not in the habit of reading newspaper articles who bought copies of Thisday last Saturday.

I was inundated with calls from everywhere. Those who could not reach me called my wife till she began to wonder what this was all about. And the article even trended on twitter. I needed no further proof that the article served its purpose. As usual with some of our people, there must be some conspiracy theory somehow. I was supposed to have been paid by some imaginary ghosts to write the article. Why are we such people of little faith? Trust me, I always write from the heart even my view won’t be so popular. A writer is supposed to possess some power of clairvoyance. He requires a third eye in order to see what many can never see. He is a prophet without honour. And he must never run away from controversy. There is nothing as horrible as not being read. Most times, the problem is not the message, it always about the messenger. That is why, it’s the middle of it all, one must thank those who took the time to read the article and even went to the extent of appreciating what they saw as a masterpiece. I would never have known it was that beautiful if they had not told me. In doing Karen a favour, I also received bountiful harvests. Such is life.

Unless you were one of us, you just can’t imagine the level of boredom that has set in in many African homes since the closure of the BIG BROTHER HOUSE. The final show in Johannesburg last Sunday was an anti-clamax of sorts. As predicted, it was coronation time for the new Queen of Africa, Ms Karen Igoh of Nigeria. But we were all wrong in thinking that the second winner would have been the South African actor, Luclay, alias Mr Otono, who was mercilessly defeated by the most unpredictable housemate Wendall, from Zimbabwe. At the end of it all it was a victory for the underdogs, Karen and Wendall, who snatched victory from the highly-rated contenders like Luclay, Lomway and Sharon O. Wendall, in our myopic view, was never in the equation. Our error of judgment had emanated from the fact that we failed to calculate Wendall into reckoning when he defeated his country mate Vimbai a week earlier to remain one of the seven finalists in the house. At that time his votes had come from Zimbabwe and Namibia. We should have suspected that he had become a major-domo by that spectacular feat.

But in our typical African fashion, we had chosen to belittle the underdogs like Karen and Wendall from the outset. And even when Karen liberated herself from our snobbery we continued to underrate Wendall and gave him no chance of winning the fat prize of $200,000. Wendall had written himself off from all intents and purposes. It was difficult not to have been intimidated by the violent outbursts of Luclay who towards the end began to carry himself with such avuncular swag. His headmaster posturing was an indication of over-confidence. And this affected Lomway who also abandoned his famed taciturnity for a new loquaciousness which was obviously induced by alcohol. He was trying everything to outclass and outpace Karen and Luclay. Unfortunately it turned out to be a wasted effort.

In a race such as this, there is only one major winner. And that was Karen. Most of the viewers were interested in Karen even if they wanted Luclay as the icing on the cake. The emergence of Wendall was therefore an anti-climax. Had Karen lost, we can all imagine what would have happened to BIG BROTHER. But mercifully, the victory of Karen made up big time for the unanticipated triumph of Wendall. By her conquest, the karenplification of Africa was total. Out of 14 countries, Karen had wowed her fans and in a total of six countries. She was able to truncate the conspiracy of those who kicked against the possibility of Nigeria winning a hat-trick by taking home the coveted prize a record third time. Such was the awesomeness of Karen’s ability to captivate his audience. That was the climax of Karen’s transfiguration from a gangster to a superstar.

Karen’s metamorphosis is one of the miracles of our time. Nothing could be more dramatic than the love we all showered on a lady that should have been hated for too many reasons. It is indeed an irony that a self-confessed hoodlum effortlessly became an iconic figure that we all adore. This is what we get when we naturally hand over our lives to the Creator and refuse to give up against all odds. I had wondered what Karen was doing in the house the first time the housemates were introduced. Many of my non-Nigerian friends had asked if someone was out to play a cruel joke on Nigeria. On mere face value, Karen was not the best Nigeria could offer. Her mate in the house Vina would have been more like it. Vina spoke the English better than the original owners of the language. She was smart and intelligent. She belonged to the class of the privilegentsia. But Karen was the exact opposite.  But in her we found the never-say-die spirit of Nigerians, our incredible resilience against all odds and the ability to trudge on in the face of daunting challenges.
Karen was all sprawled out on the floor after her infamous drinking binge a week to the end of the race, begging to be set free from the gilded cage called BIG BROTHER HOUSE. She was tired and drained and was ready to go home without the big prize. She looked really pathetic in her state of abject stupefaction. I was sure the tragic end had come for this young lady who was totally oblivious of her stupendous popularity outside the house. She was topping all polls by very wide margins. Only if she knew how close she was. Such is the ignorance of mere mortals in matters of telling the future.  She was totally blind to what surprises awaited her.  Mercifully, the big Brother ignored her plea to go home and abandon a race that was virtually hers to win.

At that moment, I truly believed some witches and wizards were pursuing this girl from home. How can you explain the fact that Karen was ready to use her own hands to throw away the $200,000 that was sitting pretty in her account even ahead of her induction into the big league? The demonic spirit of self-doubt had crept into her soul and was ready to wreak havoc in the most ruthless manner. But miraculously she rose up to continue the struggle of life. Her grand occasion would come during her final Monday chat session. Karen chose to go for the jugular and killed everyone with her compelling narrative. She combined the skills of the master story-tellers, in the mould of Chinua Achebe, Daniel Oroleye Fagunwa, Akinwumi Isola, Oladejo Okediji, Cyprian Ekwensi, John Munonye, Elechi Amadi, Amos Tutuola, and others in the lucidity of her language. Like an accomplished sniper, she fired her shots with mathematical precision. Many of her viewers were weeping across the continent as they connected with her tales of woes. She chose the right time and the best moment to drop her bombshell. It was just like writing a magnum opus. And she garnished her epic story with drama. She cried and smiled, simultaneously. It was strange but real and believable. We watched rapturously as she reeled out the tapes of her excruciating journey and the graph of her life meandered in a zigzag fashion. And that was all she needed to spin our thoughts towards her. In a jiffy, she had become the most talked about Nigerian the whole week.

The Karen fever was spreading all over Africa. And her worst critics like me became her biggest fans. In that magical week, Nigerians rose stoutly to her defence and votes poured in heavy torrents. We saw what raw determination can achieve as well as what I would love to describe as youth power. The greatest lesson to learn from this is that our youths have what it takes to liberate Nigeria and propel us to the next level.

Last week, they took over Africa and made it impossible for anyone to ignore the raw Nigerian spirit and energy in Karen. They can replicate this mega force in the arena of politics.