Rapists are normal people you see every day. They are your cousins and husbands and neighbours and classmates and priests.
It seems rape, as a topic, is enjoying some measure of attention at
the moment. It is all very good for rape, a bit discouraging for rapists
and hell for the victims. It does nothing at all for the provokers.
Yes, rape is provoked. All crimes are triggered or provoked.Most believe rapists are insane or depraved persons. This would mean that most men are insane and suffering from one depravity or the other, because all men alive have one time or the other been tempted and have attempted to have sexual relations with an unwilling partner. Rapists are normal people you see every day. They are your cousins and husbands and neighbours and classmates and priests.
So long as sex exists, and hormones and anatomy remain, rape will endure. Men must rape something. If not a woman or child, they will rape themselves. But as women are the major victims, it is left to the womenfolk to reduce the occurrence of this crime. Men in the matter of rape are unreliable. Men do not know and will never know what it really means to be raped. Because if a young man takes a dark, lonely side street on his way back from work and two ladies jump out and proceed to rape him, he most certainly would be taking that road the very next day for a repeat performance.
One hopeful way rape can be reduced is when women cease to attack men through indecent dressing. It has been said before; it has been given as excuse and justification and yes, as a cause. But indecent dressing as provocation for rape bears repeating.
For certain men, raping is simply a defence. For when such men have their sensibilities attacked by the female weapons exposed through indecent dressing and body language, these men will respond to the attack. Every provocation must be assuaged.
But there are unintended casualties and collateral damages to this sexual confrontation. It is the way of the world that the innocent and children always fall victims to events they know nothing about. Those that start fires do not always get burned. How does the dressing of a toddler provoke rape? How does a decent, well covered woman provoke rape? Many times rape victims did not in any way provoke or encourage it, but someone else did. The very indecently dressed lady passing through a side street might be lucky not to be raped, but she has aroused a man standing in the area, the next female passing through same street might not be so lucky. In an area where provocative dressing is prevalent, such as a university campus, sexual tensions are high, and a lot of children in that area are not safe. A sexually aroused man is a time bomb waiting for an opportunity.
Women dressing to kill should bear in mind that they are putting innocent children and other decent women in danger.
But can men exercise self control? Can men look away? Throughout human history how many men have been able to exercise this much chanted self control?
Women know this, although some men deny it: there is very little by way of control any healthy man can have when sex is in the vicinity. As powerful as the devil is, The Bible said, “RESIST him and he will flee”, but of sex, the Holy Book said “FLEE”. We are assuming those who wrote that book knew a thing or two.
Rape must be reduced, but heaping hope on men being able to exercise self control over sex is a waste of time. It has never worked and men will not help. Because the truth is that rape, for now, is a woman’s palaver.
This does not mean that men should not be held responsible and punished for the crime; it does not mean that rape is always a fault of the woman. But does it really matter whose fault it is? If dressing decently can reduce rape, it would be far easier to stage a campaign to encourage decent dressing in women than to expect men to exercise self control.
YNaija.com
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